Webaster let me know if I’m fuckin this up but it’s my website, you said so from the start, have never pushed me around or changed one word yet, no lectures or upset, just clerking for trouble, workin on the railroad, going on a wing and a prayer and the insane fonts, disobedient grammar, perplexing colors and marriage proposals, not bad comin from a meow-maker hauling around your

academic heft, eh,

pretty soon

I’ll learn how to fictionalize our times but first I want my friends to

know you as I know you—


You see, this is my life! It always will be! Nothing else! Just us, the cameras, and those wonderful people out there in the dark! ...All right,

 Mr. Basil,

 we’re ready for your close-up.


Laying in bed (people do this Bob), talking about movies, he said the first man you see in Thelma and Louise is

Harlan, The Rapist,

the second man you see is the

Darryl, aka Foul Husband,

Now if you are the man in the theatre you have just

seen two evil depictions of manhood, and you’re hungry for a

good man

you can identify with, someone rational, decent, purposeful, a problem solver, a man, right, so here comes Hal, as in Harvey Keitel, ok,

he meets the qualifications,

nice decent man the nice decent male viewer can connect with,

then in struts the number one Cadillac tall cool drink of manly man fix-her-upper, Michael Madsen,

gorgeous, well-spoken, Jimmy’s got the look and the money and the silver-tongue ’66 Thunderbird (transportation), and, yo, feminist Jungian male-bashing no-nothings,

he understands Louise more

than she gets him,

what a fuckin dreamboat, yay, and uh-oh,

he still wasn’t enough.


So we got the rapist, evil husband, bumbling FBI agents, rip-off Brad Pitt hitchhiker, triple-vile truck-driver, these are the

bad guys,

but good, on the

other side

are Harvey Father Figure and sexy outlaw Michael Madsen and, ok here’s

the kick, just who’s on the

 “other side”

Madsen and Keitrel are trying to rescue—Thelma and Louise? 

Nope, they’re fighting for the nice man viewer in the audience, it’s a movie by men and for men, see, here to help and open for business and uh-oh, wouldn’t ya know,

they fucked it up.

They (you) failed the women.

Poor man in audience is shocked.

He was supposed to be the solution but sorry, he’s the problem,

walks out of theatre a loser, worthless, failed women all his life, unbeknownst to him.

Smelling salts? Popcorn? Coup de grace?

The movie was directed by Ridley Scott who did Alien.

Thelma and Louise was the Alien that didn’t make the cut says Basil;

women have better luck battling aliens in outer space than they have

battling men in cross-bound













Copyright 2002 Robin Plan and  All rights reserved.